I have heard so many versions of the following life-stealing thoughts–and they truly break my heart because no one needs to live this way to be healthy. See if any of them sound like you:
“I can’t go out right now. I’m on a diet.”
“I’m afraid of going to the Millers’ parties. He always bakes and there’s so much food and booze around.”
“They called me up to meet for dinner nearby, but it was a Monday night and I’d just sworn to get back to good behaviour! I had to miss out.”
“I dread family gatherings because of the food temptation—after hours and hours of resisting all the food sitting out, I always cave and then totally binge.”
“I can’t just eat one cookie!”
“Whenever I get invited to a couples’ vacation or a wedding, I start freaking out about being thin enough and deprive myself for months.”
If this sounds like you, please hear this: When your diet makes you fearful of people, places, and food situations and takes precedence over living your one and only precious life: it’s a sure sign that it is overly restrictive, unsustainable, and mentally unhealthy.
1. My first and foremost advice to overcome this mental prison is: Your diet is likely lacking enough planned treat foods.
It may sound counterintuitive to say that actually eating a portion of your most loved treats on a weekly basis will help you lose more weight in the long term, but it will.
2. This balance is an important part of my sustained health and that of my most successful weight-loss clients. The practice of food balance can look very different for different people–to account for emotional, social, health, and schedule needs. Some of my client's reserve two to four free choice “flex” meals per week, to have whenever they wish, but often at least once at weekend parties (because they know that feeling like they can’t partake in fun shared foods can be destructively draining). Other clients prefer to have a small portion of their favorite sweet bites every night and save one full flex meal for Friday date night or Sunday lunch with family...What matters is this: rather than missing out on life and resisting your favorites things until you can’t help but binge on everything just to feel free, you can make those foods less precious and scarce by enjoying satisfying, yet not stuffing, portions in a nourishing weekly balance.
3. Now you may be thinking, “but I know I won’t be able to stop eating when I’m full!” That is diet mentality talking. When you stop totally depriving, over time, you will feel safe in the knowledge that treats will not be scarce, that humans feel best when they eat nutritiously most of the time but also experientially some of the time, and when they respect both their hunger and their fullness.
If you want to figure out what routine will work for you and your sustainable physical and mental health, let’s talk about it at your next session! Email me at ellen@yournextchapter.com or DM me on Instagram